Dirty Gerund at Ralph's Rock Diner!

THIS MONDAY, DECEMBER 14th 9PM – DIRTY GERUND BACK AT YA! this week we are proud to welcome….MAX KESSLER

Max is a young gun who’s starting to make some serious noise on both the Collegiate and National Spoken Word Scenes. He has been a member of two Emerson College Poetry Slam Teams (including the 2009 College Nationals Finalists), a member of the 2009 Cantab Team, and currently holds the title of  “Champion of Champions” at the Boston Poetry Slam (not an easy feat ya’ll, that is one rigorous honor to get your mitts on).  He has performed at several schools in the New England area, including Hampshire College, he helped found and runs the Emerson Poetry Project, a weekly poetry reading and slam series at Emerson College, a group that’s hosting the College Union National Poetry Slam (CUPSI) in Boston next spring.

Max describes his writing as “truth-seeking” and his performance as “early Metallica-ish.”

Don’t take our word for it, check Max out on You Tube.

follow this link and check out his piece called “First Love.”

BONUS RUCKUS!!!

~ FIRST ANNUAL “WE F*#$@in’ LIVE HERE! YAY WORCESTER!” Poetry Challenge ~

We live here! Now what? You tell us! Bring two poems to show your hometown pride. Sonnets about Coney Island Hot Dogs? Rants about getting shut off at Ralph’s on your 21st birthday? Rush hour in Kelly Square? Ghost-town Outlet Malls? Miss the Bijou? That one time you met the mayor at Dunks? Bring us your stories. Top scorer will get a Worcesterific prize!!!

or you can always re-imagine the tale of  a certain iconic figure that’s a legend here in the 5-0-8….

Maybe this can be out new statue!

The Illustrious Tickle Bomb Orchestra will be on hand to kick out the jams and back any poets who’s down for musical accompaniment!

SNACK TIME WILL BE BROUGHT TO YOU BY OUR PAL MANDI RACKERS!!!

BRING YOUR FRIENDS! THE MORE FOLKS COME DOWN, HELPS US SAVE MONEY ON THE OIL BILL!!!                HOT!!!!!!!!!

Last night down at Dirty Gerund held every Monday night at Ralph’s was quite a show indeed. The evening kicked off with tunes provided by the fantastic Tickle Bomb Orchestra which led right into an exciting open mic. We saw the debut on our stage of a very talented writer and performer, Casey Whirl, who assured us he’d be back. We were also treated to stirring performances by regular Gerunders Jeff Canon, Mandi Rackers, and of course Ms. Dirty Gerund herself Jackie Morrill. Boston poet extraordinaire Chris O’Carrol also wowed the audience.

After the open mic our venerable house-band kicked the jams to lead us into our intense and thought provoking feature, Sou Savoy from Boston, MA. She delivered a set with the band backing that was utterly captivating. Painting pictures of every day moments from missing out on that Clash Concert to Rising Mass Transit, moments, too often over looked, she illustrated the beauty and hilariousness of these situations. Thank you very much Sou for visiting us.

The Ruckus closed out with the “Shiny Happy People Challenge” a direct challenge to the cold, long months ahead for us all. We had three challengers set to bring the joy, Jessica Gray, Chris O’Caroll, and Jackie Morrill. The first round brought the smiles as Jessica read of the wonders of travel, Jackie read of the bliss of love, and Chris chimed in on the sam sex marriage debate?? After the dust settled on that round we went right ahead into the second, opening with Chris coming back to deliver a humorous lamentation about internet spam. Jessica had the crowd roaring along to an original ode to boys of all kinds. Jackie closed the challenge with a poem about the most undeniable joy, the pleasure of pleasuring ourselves. After the scores were calculated though we could only have one winner though all competitors made the audience feel like kindergartners on a mountain of cupcakes. Chris O’Caroll walked away with the title The Captain of Chipper. Great job to all the soldiers of sun shine and congrats to Chris. Tickle Bomb Orchestra played us off into the night. Another great fun and fantastic show under our belts. Thanks to all that came can’t wait to see you next week, We miss you already.

People are neurologically incapable of forgetting Sue Savoy.  She’s been an irreplaceably unique voice since she began on the slam scene in 2002.  You know how sometimes you laugh when listening to a particularly amusing performer (especially if other people are laughing around you too)?  Sue isn’t that kind of funny.  She elicits the kind of laughter that makes you notice the sound of your own voice because you don’t always feel it pouring out so natural, so big and so free.  And sometimes you laugh not because she’s being funny per se, but because she’s hit on something so profoundly accurate about life and experience.  What’s better is how it’s often in relation to topics that, in lesser poetic hands, would merely be burned as fuel for purely cynical and vitriolic rants.  Sue is saying something else under the surface.  It might be hope (or not), but it might not be despair either (or maybe it is, but it’s all going to be OK anyway).  Besides being dangerously humorous and thoughtful in her work, she is adroit at illustrating the everyday in unexpected ways. She is the custodian of those moments where you cock your head to the side and say, “Huh, that’s odd/sad/funny/weird/interesting/meaningful.”  Ms. Savoy can be found as a much-enjoyed regular open mic performer at the Cantab Lounge in Cambridge, as well as having featured at Stone Soup, Tapestry of Voices, Boston University and Emerson College.

BONUS RUCKUS it’s real easy for us artist types to get a bit gloomy with winter fast approaching and random family members questioning our life choices around the holiday table. SO THE DIRTY GERUND BRINGS TO YOU:

“THE SHINY HAPPY PEOPLE CHALLENGE” bring us some bright sunny words to make us forget about that sliver of daylight we’re forced to subsist on. Be in love, or in love with the idea of love, or just bring us something about puppy dogs that’ll deprogram stressed out moods and make us go “awwww……” I mean that darn smiley face was invented in Worcester!

Bring two happy poems. Depending on how many contestants we get, we’ll either do two rounds or one.

Winner gets a drink on us! Now that sounds warm, fuzzy & happy!!!

TICKLEBOMB ORCHESTRA (House Band Extraordinaire!) Will be on hand to lay the groove to all poets in need!

WE COULD USE A VOLUNTEER FOR SNACKTIME! (drop us a line)

Come on! Get happy! DG STYLE!!!

O my Jebus the ruckus was brought tonight down at Ralph’s Rock Diner. Tickle Bomb Orchestra was amazing through out the show and snack time was a hit brought by Peter the Giant With A heart of Gold.

The night kicked off with Iron Poet challenger and Dirty G co-host Nick Davis performing a poem followed by the reigning Iron Poet Champ Jackie Morrill rocking one of her own creations. Before the open mic commenced officially the opening ceremonies for the challenge where had. Yosh the fabulous drink slinger and chairman unveiled the secret ingredient as A Losing Scratch Ticket. The gauntlet dropped the competitors scurried off to the dark corners to create their “dish’s” leaving co-host Alex C to run he open mic.  The incredible jams of Tickle Bomb Orchestra rocked the crowd along with the brave, creative and lively readers featuring the surprise return of one Mareh K!!

Followed by the Open Mic our feature Brian Elliss!! His first twenty min. set  he was backed up by the band in a freewheeling, energetic, orgasmic explosion of talents. He performed from the heart and shot from the hip leaving the audience gasping and sweaty. If you haven’t seen this man read before find him on myspace.com for latest updates on shows he’ll be performing.

After the first set was over and the dust had settled the competitors, Nick Davis and Iron Poet Sexy Jackie Morrill, emerged to take the stage in “Battle Scratch Ticket”. The opening round was the orignal creation challenge with Jackie drawing first blood with a humorous take on Nick Davis’s genitals. She than delivered the knock out blow in the haiku round with Nick Davis losing his cool and having a melt down. The final round (incorporating the ingredient into an already created poem) Nick Davis had a lot of ground to make up as he was far behind. He put in an earnest effort with an all out performance jumping off bars, and breaking his dome. But in the end Jackie Morrill emerged after a great showing in the last round as the proud victor, still holding the crown as Iron Poet Sexy. In his defeat Nick Davis vowed to kiss the feat of Miss. Dirty Gerund, Jackie Morrill until she is dethroned.

To close the night Brian Elliss graced the stage on more time this time without the band. He once again performed like the titan he is. Dropping jaws, breaking hearts, and melting minds. From the bottom of our vocal box thank you Mr. Elliss for the amazing show you delivered.
Our bodies sweating, we danced the evening away as Tickle Bomb Orchestra took us out. Much gratitude to all that came can’t wait to see you next week we miss you already.
P.S.

Check us out if you can’t make it at gclef.com/impulse we stream live there every Monday

Hey Dirty Gerunders!

my man Shane Hall from Ticklebomb Orchestra (our dope house band!) has got the extra spectacular hook-up for this evening’s show!

WE ARE STREAMING LIVE!!!

LOG ONTO www.gclef.tv/impule

TONIGHT AT 9pm to check out the mayhem from the safety of your home (or cafe where you can score free wireless!)

BRIAN ELLIS lives in Jamaica Plain, a part of the the city of Boston. He reads poems of his own devising to friends and family and strangers. On Wednesday nights you can usually find him at the Cantab lounge. On Friday nights you can find him at the Whitehaus Hootenannies. Multiple Boston Cantab Poetry Slam Teams, Nationally Touring and www.writebloody.com published author will be bringing work from his book……..

Uncontrolled Experiments in Freedom

Uncontrolled Experiments in Freedom is a manic and shimmering account of the life of Brian Stephen Ellis. His words shiver, babble, rant and constantly threaten to fall apart under the weight of their own gravity. His narratives come from and carry the images of a world where many believe no poetry to exist. This is a second-hand microscope examining the fuzzy science of survival.

Brian is seriously one of my favorites in the spoken word scene. He truly brings a unique voice wherever he goes & I am sooooooo glad he’s paying us a visit! It’s been too long! check him out at www.myspace.com/brianstephenellis

BONUS RUCKUS!!!!!!!

The triumphant return of “IRON POET CHALLENGE!!!!” This week! Nick Davis is challenging reigning Iron Poet Champ & Miss Dirty Gerund, Jackie Morrill to battle in Dirty Gerund Stadium. Yosh Shartin, our resident bad-ass barman, is cookin’ up a new secret ingredient that will be unveiled at the beginning of the show. Jackie and Nick will have to devise three entrees using the secret ingredient. An original haiku, an original short poem, and of course, incorporating the ingredient into a poem they’re already written.  They will present their succulent lyrical dishes in a head to head competition, where 3 judges will give points based on taste, presentation and use of the secret ingredient.

SNACK TIME - (volunteers? email us!)

TICKLEBOMB ORCHESTRA!!! bringing crazy good improv music and mixing seamlessly with our poetry, super house band style!!!!

WE MAY BE STREAMING LIVE ONLINE- MORE DETAILS ABOUT THAT SOON!!!

I SAY!!! THAT’S SOME TASTY POETRY SHOW!!!

A coach of the Youth Speaks Hawaii repeat Championship teams at the Brave New Voices International Youth Poetry Festival and member of the 2008 and 2009 HawaiiSlam teams, Tui-Z accidentally slipped and fell in love with poetry.

Born and raised on the island of O’ahu, schooled in Theatre performance at Chapman University, and proud IATSE member, Tui-Z is a jack of all trades and a master of none.  He enjoys tropical weather, delicious high calorie food, and beer that should be eaten with a spoon.

Get ready for some sock rockin!

BONUS – First Annual “Nick Davis Presents…”

Improv “Showcase Showdown Challenge”!!!

According to Nick, “a bunch of cool stuff is gonna happen,” THAT’S GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!!!

Seriously, There will be a short head to head challenge, the winner of which will get their choice as to what improv poetry “prompt” is theirs and which will go to their opponent. Head to head bouts! We’re taking the first four contestans who want to come on down. Winner gets a “dope ass prize…” Thanks Nick!

House Band TICKLEBOMB ORCHESTRA WILL BE LIGHTING IT UP ALONGSIDE POETS!!! Shane, Brian & Justin have turned this show up a notch with their slick grooves and chunky musical interludes!!!

Snack Time this week brought to you by Jennifer Gray!!!

Lots o’ Ruckus!!! Plenty to go around!

Kate “Tak” Mogel is the President and Co-Chair of the Clark University Poetry Slam. She’s a Dirty Gerund Regular, well, one of our most recent regulars (having just turned 21 recently!!!) but is no stranger to the Worcester Poetry Scene, having qualified for the Worcester Youth Slam Team & Adult Slam Team Grand Slam Finals her first year performing in 2007. The following year, she performed with the Worcester Youth Slam Team and tore the stage apart in Washington DC with a scathing political poem employing South Park Character Voices!

This sweet tattoo is binary code for “FREE” – now that’s some sexy nerdiness on her arm that you can admire this Monday Night! Whether she’s writing about computers, heritage, or Stalin’s Therapist, Tak’s got a fresh original, off-beat writing style that witty, modest and smart! Or should we say WIKID SMAHT! Tak’s re-established the dormant Clark University Slam Scene and is working to bring spoken word back to campus in a big way! She’s into top hats, old door knobs, found objects, especially letters without names, purple eye liner, lemons, syntax and bad vegans.

BONUS!!!! DIRTY GERUND IS PROUD TO PRESENT THE “BAD POETRY I WROTE IN HIGH SCHOOL” CHALLENGE!!!

Unpack them boxes in the attic and re-visit them old dusty high school journals to bring us your saddest, goofiest, most awkward attempts at expressing yourself through words, from when you were emo’d out before they even called it EMO! We’re celebrating the return of the Worcester Youth Poetry Slam on November 20th! And want to bring ourselves back to them sad ole days when “this sucks” was all you needed to say to connect with your peers! Bring one of your worst & and we’ll have a judge (who promises not to wear earplugs) slap a score on it! Winner will receive a JOHN HUGHES DVD!!! “Bad Poetry I wrote in High School” Challenge will allow us to appreciate just how amazing a lot of the our young spoken word artists are and help raise money for the Worcester Youth Poetry Slam as they attempt to raise the bar on poetry in this town!!!

SNACKS !!!!! WILL BE PROVIDED BY PETER ERICKSON!!! WOOT!

TICKLEBOMB ORCHESTRA WILL ONCE AGAIN BE ON HAND TO TIE THE ROOM TOGETHER!!! OPEN MIC STARTS US OFF!!!!

AREN’T YOU TIRED OF MISSING STUFF!!!

Born in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, the poet born as Rob Sturma became Ratpack Slim in 2000, when he stepped into the doors of Da Poetry Lounge in Hollywood and fell in love with all things spoken word. He has been on slam teams three years consecutively, having co-hosted the Los Feliz Slam during its run, and making it to the finals stage of the National Poetry Slam in 2005 with Team Hollywood. He has contributed extensively to the website getunderground.com as a poet, a journalist, and for a while, as the poetry editor. He has performed everywhere in LA from coffeeshops to comic book shops to campuses to clubs, sharing the stage with such diverse luminaries as DJ Z-Trip, Saul Williams, and Sage Francis. He was featured on BET’s “The Way We Do It” and in the documentary “Sp!t”.

He hosts a weekly poetry open mic called Green, every Monday at the Palmer Room in Culver City with Emmy Award winning DJ Jedi and acclaimed beatboxer Joshua Silverstein. He has two new chapbooks available; You Sensitive Bastard and Nerdplay. He lives in LA with his roommates and his extensive collection of media. Rob’s on a National Tour, recently published by Write Bloody, and will have new books on hand!!!

http://www.myspace.com/ratpackslim

BONUS: FIRST ANNUAL MISS DIRTY GERUND PAGEANT

We here at the Dirty Gerund recognize that a graceful, strong, intelligent female voice is needed to help balance the over testosteronized ruckus brought about by us cro-magnon hosts! HELL! In a recent survey conducted by (loud coughing to muffle the name of the reputable survey corporation), The Dirty Gerund was surprised and honored to learn that over 80% of our open mic readers are women!

SO LET THE PANDERING BEGIN!!!         

This is no ludicrously sexist display of over coiffed hair, bikini taped tuckuses and well rehearsed answers to stupid questions: We are nerdy poets afterall!

Contestants will be judged on the following criteria:

Talent – Kick your best performance poem. This will make up a third of your score.

Interview – “And just how would you best represent the Dirty Gerund Show at oh… I don’t know… a supermarket opening?”

Reverse Pandering – Pandering works both ways! So bring us an original haiku dedicated to the Dirty Gerund.

THE WINNER WILL BE (Burger King) Crowned and Properly Sashed and (maybe not so properly) Serenaded by your humble host. A special prize is also in the works (shhhhh – secret)…

ALSO – In the interest of non-sexist “equality for all” pandering, THE MISS DIRTY GERUND PAGEANT IS OPEN TO MEN! uhm… YEAH, WHY NOT! YOU HEARD ME! uhm… MEN SHOULD BE ABLE TO WALK IN HEELS… just saying.

DISCLAIMER: if Miss Dirty Gerund cannot live up to their duties… wait, I don’t even want to know what a Miss Dirty Gerund would have to do to lose THIS crown… let’s make good choices people!!!

MONDAY’s SNACK – RICE CAKES! (in honor of Krista’s poem last week & our feature “Slim.”plus….

THIS GERUND’S GETTING too “PHAT” –

(editor’s note: that last statement was scribbled by an anonymous, unwitting punster – inquiries have been made & authorities notified)

THE END

Mark “The Colonel” Palos is the host of Open Mic Poetry @ the Bridge Cafe in Manchester, NH and a co-founder, 3 year veteran, and 2-time coach of Slam Free or Die, the NH Poetry Slam Team.  His work has appeared in several literary journals, collections, and reviews, such as “Paraphernalia”, the 2008 and 2009 Jazzmouth Festival Review, “Stray Rounds”, and most recently, “The Great American Rodeo Massacre” through Sargent Press.  Mark has performed his work on stages, in classrooms, bar rooms, backrooms, living rooms, bedrooms, backseats, basements, sub-basements, on mountaintops, rooftops, front stoops, fire escapes, beaches, street corners, sidewalks, park benches, and in back alleys all over New England and beyond.  He dreams of some day roaming the wasteland of a post-apocalyptic future in a modified Mustang on an endless search for gasoline.

Ryan “Two Belts” McLellan is a performance poet, singer/songwriter English teacher from Exeter, New Hampshire.  His poems have appeared in a few dozen journals, such as “Essence”, “Literary House Review”, “Bird’s Eye reView”, “Dance to Death” and a forthcoming publication in the “2010 Poet’s Guide to New Hampshire” anthology.  The recipient of the 2009 Esther Buffler Fellowship, he works to bring slam and spoken-word into the classroom and challenge students to look at poetry in new ways.  2009 was his first time competing in the National Poetry Slam and he could not have been more honored to be a part of team Slam Free or Die.

On The Colonel:

On Two Belts:
“McLellan? He’s a punk…and coming from me, that’s a high compliment indeed…because that punk spirit of DIY, in your face, do it in spite of those who tell you you can’t, reach out and touch someone HARD is my idea of what this stuff should be about. He’s got it.“

BONUS – FIRST ANNUAL “DIRTY GERUND IRON POET CHALLENGE!!!”