Monday! March 19th! Catch the high flying poetic antics of Portland Oregon’s STEPHEN MEADS! Musical Guest ARIBAND CD Release Preview! Plus the Obligatory St. Paddy’s Limerick Challenge!

Happy March Gladness Everyone! We’re having a great one with excellent shows and great turnouts, it seems every week! We’re on a good clip and hope things keep getting more interesting as the weather gets better and better!

FEATURED POET: On Tour from Portlandia, STEPHEN MEADS is a writer of things. His unmatched energy, incredible wit, and acrobatic performances made him an integral member of the Bay Area’s collaborative writing and performing ensembles from 2005-2011, and he annually serves as one of three panel judges for the National Poetry Slam’s legendary Nerd Slam. Stephen was a member of the Tourette’s Without Regrets 2011 slam team, the Berkeley 2010 slam team, and Oakland’s 2009 slam team, as well as San Francisco’s 2008 and 2005 teams, the last of which placed 6th at that year’s National Poetry Slam. Stephen is currently making his home in Portland Oregon, where he has taken on occasional hosting duties as part of the Portland Poetry Slam. It’s been a while since this high flying (literally, he’ll jump on the bar and word pounce you) came through town, we’ve grown and changed a lot, let’s welcome him back and show him how we can actually hold out liquor now!

MUSICAL GUESTARIBAND CD Release Preview! 2012 Pulse Magazine Best Female Artist Nominated, Indie Folks, Singer Song write ARI CHARBONNEAU is no stranger to Ralph’s of the Gerund, but there have been a lot of exciting things happening for this home grown talent, movie soundtrack, TV appearances and a brand new 21 track album called “Burn it In”, with a CD Release Party Happening at Ralph’s March 23rd, we figured we’d exercise our “good timing” skills and invite this great voice back to feature as our musical guest, in exchange for some tasty sample previews from her new album! I know… smart! Check out MP3’s, video and more exciting news about “nature’s source of unfiltered rock” at www.ariband.com!

BONUS RUCKUS: Our wildly un-original, historically inaccurate, culturally misappropriated post St. Paddy’s Day, Limerick Challenge! The form actually originated in England. Go figure. I’ve spent entirely too much time on Wiki reading up on this structured form of nonsense poetry, meant to drop the brows of even the most stalwart Dirty Gerunder. Bring us your grossest, sassiest, blush inducing-est, groan-iest, disgusting-est Limerick and win a box of Lucky Charms. Neither Limericks or Lucky Charms are actually Irish. We figure if we’re gonna get it all wrong, we might as well get it all wrong all the way! Save some beer money for Monday!

PAULIE LIPMAN‘s been killing it on bass lately! (This is what he looked like the last time he was in a band!) Duct Tape Band expects the safe return of one LARRY WILSON to this Monday’s show. YOSH & CHICKEN hardly knew he was even gone! Visual Artists just seem to happen, so I trust in the elements that we will have a great one Monday! Snacks? As much as we love Emilee‘s creations, but IF we go another week without a volunteer, it’s RICE CAKES for the lot of you’s! NICHOLAS EARL DAVIS has a job, and you’re flirting with other presidential candidates? Gah!

We’ll leave you with some words of wisdom from our out of town guest!

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