Nov. 9th – Dirty Gerund goes on a diet w/ Los Angeles’ own ROB “Ratpack Slim” Sturma! PLUS FIRST ANNUAL “MISS DIRTY GERUND PAGEANT”!!!

ratpackslim

Born in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, the poet born as Rob Sturma became Ratpack Slim in 2000, when he stepped into the doors of Da Poetry Lounge in Hollywood and fell in love with all things spoken word. He has been on slam teams three years consecutively, having co-hosted the Los Feliz Slam during its run, and making it to the finals stage of the National Poetry Slam in 2005 with Team Hollywood. He has contributed ratpackslim2extensively to the website getunderground.com as a poet, a journalist, and for a while, as the poetry editor. He has performed everywhere in LA from coffeeshops to comic book shops to campuses to clubs, sharing the stage with such diverse luminaries as DJ Z-Trip, Saul Williams, and Sage Francis. He was featured on BET’s “The Way We Do It” and in the documentary “Sp!t”.

ratpackslim3He hosts a weekly poetry open mic called Green, every Monday at the Palmer Room in Culver City with Emmy Award winning DJ Jedi and acclaimed beatboxer Joshua Silverstein. He has two new chapbooks available; You Sensitive Bastard and Nerdplay. He lives in LA with his roommates and his extensive collection of media. Rob’s on a National Tour, recently published by Write Bloody, and will have new books on hand!!!

http://www.myspace.com/ratpackslim

BONUS: FIRST ANNUAL MISS DIRTY GERUND PAGEANT

crownWe here at the Dirty Gerund recognize that a graceful, strong, intelligent female voice is needed to help balance the over testosteronized ruckus brought about by us cro-magnon hosts! HELL! In a recent survey conducted by (loud coughing to muffle the name of the reputable survey corporation), The Dirty Gerund was surprised and honored to learn that over 80% of our open mic readers are women!

SO LET THE PANDERING BEGIN!!!         

This is no ludicrously sexist display of over coiffed hair, bikini taped tuckuses and well rehearsed answers to stupid questions: We are nerdy poets afterall!

Contestants will be judged on the following criteria: pageant3

Talent – Kick your best performance poem. This will make up a third of your score.

Interview“And just how would you best represent the Dirty Gerund Show at oh… I don’t know… a supermarket opening?”

Reverse Pandering – Pandering works both ways! So bring us an original haiku dedicated to the Dirty Gerund.

THE WINNER WILL BE (Burger King) Crowned and Properly Sashed and (maybe not so properly) Serenaded by your humble host. A special prize is also in the works (shhhhh – secret)…

ALSO – In the interest of non-sexist “equality for all” pandering, THE MISS DIRTY GERUND PAGEANT IS OPEN TO MEN! uhm… YEAH, WHY NOT! YOU HEARD ME! uhm… MEN SHOULD BE ABLE TO WALK IN HEELS… just saying.

pageant4DISCLAIMER: if Miss Dirty Gerund cannot live up to their duties… wait, I don’t even want to know what a Miss Dirty Gerund would have to do to lose THIS crown… let’s make good choices people!!!

 

 

MONDAY’s SNACK – RICE CAKES! (in honor of Krista’s poem last week & our feature “Slim.”plus….

THIS GERUND’S GETTING too “PHAT”

(editor’s note: that last statement was scribbled by an anonymous, unwitting punster – inquiries have been made & authorities notified)

THE END

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